Anti-telemarketing Script

[Scott MacVicar]

This got posted on one of the IRC channels i frequent, its probably old but its the first time I've seen it.

http://www.xs4all.nl/~egbg/counterscript.html

[MrNase]

The last time one of them called I let my granny answer the phone.. She spoke to the girl for about 10 minutes and it was the girl who quitted the call

[Zachery]

Fortuneatly since moving to a VoIP number I haven't had any issues yet

[MGM]

That is pretty interesting... I'd do it just to see if they would answer all the questions...

MGM out

[Guest]

Heres an idea: hang up

[Zachery]

Heres an idea: hang up

Better Idea, pick up, say hello, play some music for them.

[Dean C]

It's more fun to play with them, just put on an accent and have some fun

[Chris M]

The ones that annoy me are the automated ones

The people, you can politely tell them to cease and desist from calling your number, with minimal use of swear words

Satan

[Onimua]

Usually I just say something random, like "Hello, city morgue: You sack 'em, we pack 'em." I never have had one call me since...

[Chris M]

Sounds like a good plan, but I'd fail miserably - I'd crack up half-way through

So I'd resort to the tried and tested polite telling them where they can put their phone

Satan

[DirectPixel]

This got posted on one of the IRC channels i frequent, its probably old but its the first time I've seen it.

http://www.xs4all.nl/~egbg/counterscript.html

"Counter-Telemarketers Win."

[PGN]

I like playing with telemarketers...Here's some examples:
1.
Telemarketer: Hello. I'm-
Me: Oh, hello operator!
Telemarketer: No, I'm-
Me: Give me number 9!
Telemarketer: What? I-
Me: And if you disconnect me
Telemarketer: Why would I discon-
Me: I'll cut off your-
Telemarketer: *Hangs Up*

2.
Telemarketer: Hello. I'm calling to offer you a time share
Me: I'm very happy with my long distance company, thank you very much
Telemarketer: What?
Me: I'm going to hang up now
Me: *Hangs up*

[Floris]

I always ask them to contact me in braille because I am deaf.
Then they ask me why braille if I am deaf.
Then I just idle a long time.
And they hang up.

[MGM]

I always ask them to contact me in braille because I am deaf.
Then they ask me why braille if I am deaf.
Then I just idle a long time.
And they hang up.

What's braille?

MGM out

[Dean C]

What's braille?

MGM out

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Braille